After five hours in the car, we have settled into the city of MaoMing, China. Mara Ruth was born here sixteen months ago, and tomorrow we will spend the day at the orphanage where she has lived all her life. It will be an important, yet difficult, day as she interacts with children she has been around and caregivers who have nurtured her. This time will offer her a bit of closure while also giving us a glimpse of her life to this point.
I look forward to sharing more details about the MaoMing orphanage tomorrow, but suffice to say at this point that all of the children in this orphanage are classified as “special needs” children in China. Some of these needs are classified as minor while others are identified as major. Regardless of these children’s specific situations, their greatest need is for a mom and a dad.
I am reminded as we go into tomorrow that the initiative for adoption obviously resides with a parent, not with a child. A child does not choose to initiate adoption; instead, a parent chooses to adopt a child. The same is true in spiritual adoption, as well. The Word is clear that in our sin, we were once children of wrath (Ephesians 2:3), alienated from God (Colossians 1:21) and totally unable to save ourselves from our sin in order to become His sons. Talk about special needs. Our minds were blinded (Romans 1:21-23), our emotions were disordered (Romans 1:26-27), our bodies were defiled (Romans 1:24-25), our wills were distorted (Romans 3:10-12), and our relationships were broken (James 4:1-4). We were slaves to sin (John 8:34), lovers of darkness (John 3:20), morally evil (Genesis 8:21), and spiritually lost (Luke 19:10). And the good news of the gospel is that God saw our need and initiated our adoption:
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places, even as he chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him. In love he predestined us for adoption as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will, to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved. In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace, which he lavished upon us, in all wisdom and insight making known to us the mystery of his will, according to his purpose, which he set forth in Christ as a plan for the fullness of time, to unite all things in him, things in heaven and things on earth (Ephesians 1:3-10).
Understanding this biblical foundation of spiritual adoption is critical for understanding the proper motivation for physical adoption. We have a tendency in our day to romanticize adoption, envisaging cute children around the world (both domestically and internationally) just waiting to be adopted. Obviously, they are all cute in their own ways, but they are also needy…and many of their needs are great.
As a pastor of a church that is, by God’s grace, captivated by an adoptive culture, I have talked and prayed with countless parents who have fostered and/or adopted children with challenging needs. And the only sustainable motivation for these parents is the glorious reality of the gospel. What do you do when the child you adopted has fetal alcohol syndrome and can’t ever seem to sit still without throwing a tantrum? What happens when that child’s birth mother was addicted to crack cocaine and as a result, he or she has permanent brain damage that affects their behavior for the rest of their life, and in turn their teenage years turn into a living nightmare for you, for them, and for your entire family? What happens when the years that child has spent in an institutional orphanage by themselves causes them to not know how to even begin to receive love, so that every time you try to show love, they resist it? What happens when the child you adopt is dangerous?
Mere altruism will not sustain you in situations like these. Only the gospel will. Because in the gospel, you are reminded on a daily basis that there was a day when you were a child of wrath, filled with evil desires, totally unable to control your sinfulness, and desperately in need of Savior, and God reached down His hand of mercy past the depth of your wickedness in order to adopt you as His own. When there was no initiative to draw you to Him, He initiated a relationship with you. So now, when you see a child with minor or major needs, you reach out to that child, simply because you realize you are that child. I can’t improve here upon the words of my friend, Russell Moore, who wrote a wonderful book called Adopted for Life. He wrote:
Imagine for a moment that you’re adopting a child. As you meet with the social worker in the last stage of the process, you’re told that this 12-year-old has been in and out of psychotherapy since he was three. He persists in burning things, and attempting repeatedly to skin animals alive. He “acts out sexually,” the social worker says, although she doesn’t really fill you in on what that means. She continues with a little family history. This boy’s father, grandfather, great-grandfather, and great-great-grandfather all had histories of violence, ranging from spousal abuse to serial murder. Each of them ended their own lives. Think for a minute. Would you want this child? If you did adopt him, wouldn’t you watch nervously as he played with your other children? Would you watch him nervously as he looks at the knife on the kitchen table? Would you leave the room as he watched a movie on TV with your daughter, with the lights out?
And then Dr. Moore writes:
Well he’s you. And he’s me. That’s what the Gospel is telling us.
My goal is certainly not to paint a grim picture of adoption, and many children in foster and/or adoption situations are perfectly healthy. But adoption is not easy, and children are indeed needy. It’s important to realize, then, that we adopt not because we are rescuers. No, we adopt because we are the rescued. And in this way, the gospel uniquely portrays, compels, and ultimately sustains adoption.
Posted by Carolyn Brewer on November 27, 2011 at 10:12 am
Thankful that Jesus is Enough to meet all our needs…….for nothing is impossible for Him……as our Protector, Defender and Shield……..
Praying that Mara Ruth grows in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and others….Luke 2:52, as Jesus grew…..
Blessings in Christ….
Posted by julia on November 27, 2011 at 10:50 am
So needed to hear this today.
Posted by Karen Yingling on November 27, 2011 at 11:23 am
David – thank you for your transparency in this trip. We are waiting our TA for a child in MaoMing. I anxiously await your post about your visit
Posted by Chris Caughran on November 27, 2011 at 11:35 am
I love your choice of names for Mara Ruth; could you share with us her Chinese name?
Posted by L. on November 27, 2011 at 12:16 pm
“We are the rescued.”
May God grant us to live in light of this, for His glory.
Posted by EricaErica on November 27, 2011 at 12:58 pm
Thanks for this encouraging post! I did recent book review called Wait No More by Kelly and John Rosati and it really showed me how difficult but rewarding it is to adopt a child as Christ has adopted us.
Posted by Tommi on November 27, 2011 at 1:13 pm
wow
Posted by Andrea on November 27, 2011 at 1:26 pm
Wow – thank you for this. My husband and I have 3 sons. We have looked into adoption for a long time now. Financially, we are unable to pursue an expensive adoption. We are praying and hoping that, if it is God’s Will, a baby finds us. We would love to have a little girl that our 3 boys could protect and take care of. God Bless you, your ministry, and your growing family. P.S., thank you for writing “Radical” – I recently completed the Bible Study – it is life-changing. Andrea
Posted by Eric Rademacher on November 27, 2011 at 4:14 pm
Please don’t make a decision to provide a home for a child in need. As strange as this may sound. God will see to it. He owns cattle on a thousand hills. Trust Him. There are many resources available that He can work through to make it happen. I currently have 3 biological children, 1 adopted from china 5 years ago and we are in the process of adopting a special needs from China. We can not “afford” it either, but God has worked amazingly. Lord willing, we will travel in March/April. We recently had a family stay with us last week that have 3 biological boys, and 4 special needs children. They raised 100k in the 5 years to adopt these children. God provided for them; He can for you as well.
Posted by Eric Rademacher on November 27, 2011 at 4:16 pm
Sorry, I forgot to add “a financial decision.” at the end of the first sentence. I’m not sure how to edit it.
Posted by Tisha on November 27, 2011 at 5:00 pm
I would also like to encourage you. We are in the process of our second adoption. We have 3 biological boys and twin girls that we adopted from Ethiopia in 2009. Currently we are waiting for a referral of 1, 2 or 3 boys from Uganda. When we started in July we didn’t have a penny saved, but we just stepped out in faith. The Lord has provided for all our needs and them some!
This weekend there was a family that needs to get to Africa asap, because the child that they are in the process of adopting is very sick. In 10 hours they raised $16,000!!! Only God can do that.
He will provide!
Posted by Amy on November 27, 2011 at 5:19 pm
Andrea, check out domestic adoption, too. For us, it was only about $300 and our child qualifies for free college tuition to a state school. Don’t let $ scare ya away. It is overwhelming, but God is all powerful!
Posted by dsprtlydpndnt on November 27, 2011 at 11:44 pm
In California our high risk sibs from CA state foster care costs us hardly a thing and we receive adoption assistance until they reach 18. When we were missionaries in Nigeria for 6 years, the state direct deposited our checks $1200.00 directly into our support account! God’s ways are limitless.
We have 2 bio and 2 chosen children. IT is VERY HARD to adopt kids with history. Attachment disorder. But the post addresses the grace available.
Posted by Michelle Johnson on November 28, 2011 at 2:57 pm
He also owns the hill!
Posted by Jenny Monier on November 29, 2011 at 3:38 pm
Andrea,
I also wanted to share with you that we recently brought home our son from the Ukraine with Down Syndrome. My husband is only an Associate Minister and I am a full time stay at home mom. We did not have the funds immediately available to complete an expensive adoption. But in a mere 7 months we raised the funds needed and a little extra that helped with some immediate medical needs, and we now have 4 happy little boys:) It CAN be done, you just need to as the Father where the money is:) As a very good friend shared with me, “God funds what He favors”. So very true! He certainly favors adoption since we are all adopted:)
To David- we rejoice with you in the adoption of your precious little girl. May God continue to bless you and guide you. Your book, “Radical”, played a huge role in our decision to adopt and adopt a child with special needs. Thank you for sharing your faith and your encouragement to your Christian brothers and sisters.
Posted by Stephanie Bass on November 27, 2011 at 2:23 pm
Dear David and Heather–May the God of all glory and hope continue to fill you as you are in China and as you parent and love Mara Ruth and your boys. We returned in October 2010 with our second adopted daughter from China. Her adoption has been very different from our first, as this second adoption we met our daughter when she was 12.5 yrs. old, and our first adoption was a 10 month old baby girl. Needless to say, the differences were vast, and continue to be. We couldn’t agree more that adoption is not easy. As Dr. Moore also asserts in his book, physical adoption isn’t about a humanitarian cause, or as you said, it’s not about rescuing. It’s truly spiritual warfare; just as our adoption in Christ is. We continue to pray for Christian families to be sensitive to answer His call for adoption; and to lean into the merciful arms of Jesus after they bring their children home when things get tough. When our oldest daughter initially pushed away and resisted our attempts to love her, the Lord graciously reminded me that I have done that often in my walk with Him. As you know, over time Mara Ruth will come to recognize the love of Jesus in you and will allow you to lavish her with Daddy-like love, the only love a sweet princess is due.—Stephanie Bass–Decatur, AL
Posted by Frankie on November 27, 2011 at 2:41 pm
I praise God for the Platt family, as they share the Gospel in Words and Deeds. God’s blessings upon their family and lives.
Posted by templehome on November 27, 2011 at 3:13 pm
Parents of 4 chinese adoptees–it is not easy, thanks for helping me keep on trying to deal withe challenges of this phase of our lives. (they are all 4 teenagers at this time, adopted at 3, 6, 12, and 12)
Posted by Amy on November 27, 2011 at 5:15 pm
Yes, loving children through it… just as our Father loves us through…
Excited for all with the adoption!
Posted by DawnK on November 27, 2011 at 7:54 pm
Amen! Awesome post, thank you for posting it! Sharing with others.
Posted by jwunderlich on November 27, 2011 at 8:47 pm
Reblogged this on Faith and Family and commented:
This is a great blog…
Posted by Therese on November 27, 2011 at 9:23 pm
What a wonderful gift adopting is! And, for us designed by God. My almost 6 year old daughter was adopted from an orphanage in the city of MaoMing, China, and so is her good friend who lives right near us in Nashville. They were crib mates three cribs apart, and now they play together as friends. God is so good!
Posted by laurajonesjournal on November 27, 2011 at 9:37 pm
Congratulations Platt family. Not long ago we were right where you are!
What a gift God has given you. Thank you for your thoughts and perspective and pointing to Jesus and our adoption as children of God. I’ll be pointing people to this blog, it’s so encouraging. We are helping teach an adoption Sunday School class at our church in Wheaton. This is a great resource. Press on and thank you.
blessings,
Posted by Barbara on November 28, 2011 at 1:55 am
Brother David, you write with such passion, love and truth. What a joy it’s been reading Mara Ruth adoption blog. Thank you and know we are praying for all the Platt’s. Praying for your safe return home.
Posted by Why do We Adopt?? | on November 28, 2011 at 7:04 am
[...] Read more of his great article – The Gospel and Adoption [...]
Posted by MichaelEdits on November 28, 2011 at 8:48 am
In 2000, I adopted a cat from the SPCA in Hong Kong. She lives with us in North Carolina now.
Posted by Ginger on November 28, 2011 at 8:53 am
David and Heather, Thank you for sharing! We have adopted twice from China,our youngest we brought home this past June. We are truly blessed that the Lord has blessed us with our two precious daughters. I am advocating for a little girl in Maoming she is at Maonan SWI. Is Mara Ruth from Maonan or Maoming SWI? I am looking forward to your post once you have visited the orphanage. Praying for all of you!
Posted by Michele Radue Willis on November 28, 2011 at 9:16 am
We’re praying for you guys every step of the way. I selfishly can’t wait to hear about Maoming since our daughter is there as well and we anticipate TA soon! I’m so glad you guys are getting to meet the people who have cared for our precious daughters!! I know you will thank them and pray for them…I’m so excited for you guys!!!
Posted by Russ Murray on November 28, 2011 at 12:35 pm
Thank you, David! It’s amazing that we were dead in sin & He brought us alive in Christ. (Eph. 2:1-6) We were not a people, but are now the people & children of God. (I Jn. 3:1) Good success as you seek to follow His lead. Enjoy the journey he has laid out for you! Blessings, Russ
Posted by Linda Karner on November 28, 2011 at 1:56 pm
Pow.wer.full!!
Posted by Michelle Johnson on November 28, 2011 at 3:04 pm
Thank you for this encouraging post, Pastor! We are in the process of adopting a sibling group from Haiti. We are in the dossier stage, so we still have a ways to go. Our motivation is to be a visual picture of the glorious Gospel of Jesus Christ. Loved Russell Moore’s book! So honest and true.
God bless your family richly!
Posted by John W. Carlton on November 28, 2011 at 5:13 pm
In 2003 our son and his wife adopted a baby boy–our first grandchild. He is our miracle because he was saved from an abortionist’s fate. I was taking a preaching class at the time, and my sermon that I preached to the class, and subsequently in several different situations was on the topic of adoption. Our son and wife have adopted another son since this, and our daughter and her husband have 2 natural children. We cannot tell the difference between an adopted child and a natural child. God loves us unconditionally. From a human standpoint it would be impossible for me to adopt that child you described at the end of your blog, but because of God’s wonderful love, I have been adopted in the His family even though I am much more vile and in need of salvation. Thanks for posting.
Posted by Rebecca Maas on November 29, 2011 at 6:22 am
We are waiting to hear about a couple of children at MaoMing we are interested in adopting. Can’t wait to hear more about your trip.
Posted by Adoption: A choice or a command? « Thoughts with accent on November 29, 2011 at 12:34 pm
[...] Is it true what some suggest, that by taking active part into this process and practically ‘doing something’, we may [...]
Posted by Cristal on November 29, 2011 at 12:37 pm
Thank you for being REAL: “Understanding this biblical foundation of spiritual adoption is critical for understanding the proper motivation for physical adoption. We have a tendency in our day to romanticize adoption, envisaging cute children around the world (both domestically and internationally) just waiting to be adopted.”
Again, thank you for being real!
Posted by The Gospel and Adoption « God's Story…Our Family on November 29, 2011 at 2:15 pm
[...] http://bhglobalblog.org/2011/11/27/the-gospel-and-adoption/ Like this:LikeBe the first to like this post. Filed under Quote | Leave a comment [...]
Posted by Step 1: Remembering my Adoption « Living the Coveted Life on November 30, 2011 at 7:50 am
[...] love what David Platt says: …in the gospel, you are reminded on a daily basis that there was a day when you were a [...]
Posted by greg fields on December 4, 2011 at 4:06 pm
David –
I wish you would go in to more detail on the last point you made. Just how does the gospel sustain a parent in those situations you mentioned or the one outlined by Moore? How does knowing you “were that child” sustain? I think I struggle with this sort of spiritual/physical adoption rhetoric, because it seems long on descriptive power but short on the explanatory. It actually seems more directed at motivating adoption of children with these needs than helping parents in the midst of parenting them. I might also add this question: how does the gospel inform interventions and strategies aimed at helping the special needs children you mentioned?
Posted by Clan Elliott on December 5, 2011 at 10:07 am
[...] I came across this blog entry from David Platt. He and his family just picked up his new daughter from China, so he’s been [...]
Posted by Mark Riley on February 27, 2012 at 6:08 am
I feel that the ‘adoption’ community are often misled and misinformed about the domestic situations in countries where they are adopting from – especially in Africa. Linking physical adoption to our spiritual adoption is fueling Inter-country adoption which can be extremely dangerous. Here in Uganda I can tell you that it is a can of worms. Children are ‘trafficked’ into institutional care in order to meet the demand of International adopters who are told, often from the pulpit, that these children have no one and that there is a crisis. In fact 80% of children in institutional in Uganda care HAVE families who could take care of them with some support. Domestic solutions including reunification, kinship care, domestic adoption and fostering are routinely overlooked in favor of Inter-Country adoption. Agencies are setting up and funding child care institutions and we are seeing families coerced into child abandonment to meet the demands of international adopters.
As a result IA is completely undermining the efforts of government and key partners to implement domestic solutions before IA is considered. The problem in Uganda is that the children who *really* need an international adoption solution are rarely the children who are being adopted out of Uganda.
In addition, due to the powerful movement and lobbying of the IA community (including church leaders), the balance of justice is actually tipped in favour of international adopters over Ugandans and expats who want to adopt. Example – domestically families have to foster-to-adopt for 3 years before they can apply for adoption, during this time the placement could be disrupted should the birth family come forward and want the child back. During the 3 years, without a long horrible process, they cannot leave East Africa with their child. An international family though can swoop in and within a number of weeks leave with the child without any restrictions that are imposed on the domestic family. How unjust is that? – when it is harder for Ugandans to adopt than it is for international!
We cannot advocate for international adoption without advocating for domestic solutions, justice, truth and transparency in all areas of adoption. I love the work of David Platt – BUT in this case I feel he is being naïve with the details and communicating a wrong and damaging message.
Mark Riley, Alternative Care Consultant, Uganda
Posted by Jenny Monier on February 27, 2012 at 7:16 am
Dear sir,
While I agree with you to a point, I would like to point out that special needs children DO need to be adopted outside of their own countries (in most cases). Six months ago we adopted our son with Down Syndrome from the Ukraine. Do you know what his future was in the Ukraine? An ADULT mental institution. My son is so smart and happy; he functions at a high level despite his Down Syndrome. 70% of special needs children (in Eastern Europe) that are transferred to these mental institutions DIE within the first year. What do homeland governments do for these children? NOTHING. In fact, most people in these countries think that these children should have been aborted (MURDERED) and deserve to have a life of misery. They consider the children to be defective and trash. I watched people SPIT, SHOVE, and verbally accost my son while I was in the Ukraine and it was sickening. These special needs children NEVER get adopted within their own countries due to ignorance.
The ministry with which helped facilitate our adoption, Reece’s Rainbow, IS trying to educate people in eastern european countries about various disabilities and how to better cope. But until these countries catch up with their views, the best option IS International adoption.
With that in mind, the Scripture Proverbs 24:12 comes to mind. God holds us responsible to act if we know of someone in need. I saw my son’s listing on Reece’s Rainbow and I knew what God was asking me to do. My son needed me and even though he was in the Ukraine my husband and I moved mountains to rescue him. To this day our son tells us that he never wants to go back. He has a hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11)
Respectfully,
Jenny Monier
Posted by Mark Riley on February 27, 2012 at 11:10 pm
Dear Jenny,
I agree that there is a place for IA, absolutely. Also, each country is different with different demographics and different issues. Adoption from Asia is completely different from Adoption from Africa. The problem is that most people promoting International Adoption do not contextualise it leading to many people being inspired to adopt without the necessary information to ensure their adoption is ethical.
In my original post I said “The problem in Uganda is that the children who *really* need an international adoption solution are rarely the children who are being adopted out of Uganda.”. I still stand by that. Disabled children rarely get adopted out fo Uganda while healthy children WITH families are leaving by the truck load.
I would also say that I have been privileged to sit on an adoption panel to assess Ugandans wanting to adopt. I looked through my notes and during the last adoption panel a third of the potential adopted parents were willing to take on children with special needs. What I find unacceptable though is when visiting institutions we have found lists of Ugandan families who have wanted to adopt collecting dust while children have been adopted internationally. This is an injustice and I *really* hope and pray that the church, especially in the US, wise up to some of the realities on the ground. And I say that in total love as I believe the US is the most generous and caring nation on the planet when it comes to OVC issues.
I deal with at least 6 complaints or issues every week where International adoptions in Uganda are going wrong have issues or where we have found that the children are not ‘orphans’ at all. I deal with children being trafficked into institutional care who are then made available for IA.
I find it frustrating that these issues are routinely overlooked and side stepped in the current ‘orphan’ ministries. Like I said previously I love the work of David Platt but let’s be smart and tell the whole story. We are seeing a HUGE movement in the US to adopt from Uganda which is fuelling unethical practices and yes even child trafficking. As followers of Christ we must urgently address these issues. I am constantly dealing with broken lives of wonderful people who have been inspired to adopt by people like David Platt and Tom Davies but due to the complexities and issues in Uganda are ending up hurt and broken when ig goes wrong.
These issues are rarely spoken about at adoption conferences and I think it’s a mistake.
Blessings